3 Body Positivity Lessons from Husband, the “Virtual Fashion Designer”

Husband has a hobby as a virtual fashion designer of sorts.

Portrait of Husband (the hand, not the model sketch)? Just kidding. Husband doesn’t wear that shade of nail polish. Photo by Ron Lach : https://www.pexels.com/photo/a-person-holding-white-printer-paper-7761829/

Well, that’s not really accurate. [It would kinda be like the equivalent of Husband describing my blogging or writing activities as “JYP types some words into the internet.“] But as a non-expert in this niche hobby determined to maintain anonymity for both of us, “virtual fashion designer” is the best description I could come up with.

Anyway, I was watching Husband work on this hobby and I realized that there may be some intriguing body positivity lessons to learn from Husband’s work. Seeing as I have struggled with body image issues and I’m certainly not the only one, I thought this would be a good topic to blog about.

Husband agreed to let me write about him under two conditions:

  1. That I make it clear that “virtual fashion designer” is my inaccurate description, not his.
  2. That I made it clear that Husband does not make virtual porn. So please note for the record that my husband does not make porn.

Without further ado, here are some body positivity lessons from Husband, the virtual fashion designer:

1) Fix the clothes not the body

In one instance, Husband was working on a particular virtual outfit. Unfortunately, the virtual clothes did not seem to fit the virtual model. The issue at hand was that the model’s ass kept popping out of the dress.

JYP (pointing helpfully): The model’s ass is popping out of the dress.

Husband (mildly frustrated): I know. I’m fixing it.

JYP: How do you fix it? Do you erase part of the model’s ass to get it to fit in the dress?

Husband: Of course not. I fix the dress physics so that it properly contains the model’s ass.

The message of this exchange is that it’s not the body that’s the issue requiring adjustment; it’s the clothes.

Don’t blame the ass for being badass; make the clothes badass enough to fit it. Photo by Monika Kozub on Unsplash

2) There is demand for realistic body images

One might think that it the world of virtual fashion design, there would be just as much demand for unrealistic body images. And in fact, many of the virtual models that Husband virtual designs for do in fact have Barbie-like proportions – impossibly narrow virtual waist with impossibly large gravity-defying virtual boobs. That said, many people have been asking for models that have more realistic figures.

Also, not everyone wants models to be virtually naked. I mean, a lot of people do, but there’s also demand for virtual models with some decency. Husband designed an outfit that was well-received, but the client did request that the bodice cover more of the model’s midriff. Go figure. Never make assumptions about tastes and preferences.

3) There’s no substitute for the real thing

I must again state that Husband is not creating virtual porn.

That said, as a result of this hobby, images of naked women are display on the large monitor in my living room more often than one might expect of a semi-religious household in which one half of said household grew up Orthodox.

JYP: Boy, there are a lot of naked women around here!

Husband: Do you mind?

JYP: Nah. I don’t really care.

Then I paused and thought about it a bit.

JYP: I mean, I think I’d be a little insulted if you said this virtual model’s imaginary boobs are better than mine, but otherwise, I don’t really care.

Husband: Of course not! Your boobs are great!

JYP: Thank you. A woman likes to hear that sort of thing.

By the way, in case anyone was concerned, my left breast has fully recovered from my recent stupid injury.

There’s also a lot of unsexy screens like this in my living room. Virtual fashion design ain’t all just looking at imaginary naked boobies. C’mon, you didn’t really think I was going to post naked pictures on this blog. This blog is pretty NSFW, but it’s not *that* NSFW. Then again, I did just post a pic of a stock photo model’s ass above, so…Photo by Pixabay: https://www.pexels.com/photo/code-coding-computer-cyberspace-270373/

Bonus: It is possible to sexualize literally anything

This has absolutely nothing to do with body positivity nor is it a life lesson, but I found this conversation snippet too entertaining not to share. This conversation took place a while ago on a long boring car ride, the kind where you will just talk about deeply random shit just to pass the time. I was discussing the term “fucktangular“, a term I had only heard of from Ashley‘s blog and that I’ve never seen used in any other context.

JYP (musing aloud): “Fucktangular” seems like a ridiculous term. If something is a mess, call it a “clusterfuck”. “Fucktangular” sounds like you’re trying to sexualize rectangles. That’s dumb. Rectangles are polygons. They have no sexuality.

Husband, a virtual fashion designer: I made a pair of panties out of polygons.


JYP: Congratulations. You have found a way to sexualize polygons.

Some sexy, sexy rectangles. Photo by Monstera: https://www.pexels.com/photo/red-paper-hearts-on-burlap-parts-5874699/

Happy Wednesday! May your clothes be as badass as your ass is.

Reposting this badass photo feels appropriate for Hump Day. Now I have My Humps stuck in my head…Photo by Monika Kozub on Unsplash


  1. As much as we all seem to love naked bodies, clothing is everything. Very cool hobby husband has. I used to wear nail polish when I play flamenco guitar. I was the one who got wife in to painting her nails. I used to paint my right pinky nail red. One time when I was doing a presentation, my boss noticed my red pinky nail. He said, “I don’t want to know.”

    Liked by 1 person

    • Blue hair and red nails? Stylin’! I love it.

      I once did Husband’s makeup and painted Husband’s nails black for a Purim costume. Took the makeup off afterwards, but I tried to convince him to go to work the next day with the black nails. His job’s dress code and culture was probably casual enough that he could get away with it. He said no and took off the nail polish.

      You may have inspired me. I haven’t done my own nails in a while and now I’m thinking I should. Hmmm…

      Liked by 1 person

      • You should paint your nails. My new staff member does really wild nails and TikToks how to do them. We have a dress code that says not tattoos and facial peicings showing, but we only enforce it for staff who go out in the public.

        Liked by 1 person

        • I don’t have the skill or patience for wild nails or TikTok. I have just enough skill and patience to paint my dominant hand with my non-dominant hand and not get nail polish all over myself and the bathroom, but that is it. Also I’ve been kinda lazy and just going to a salon if I feel motivated enough to do something about my nails in the first place.

          I’ve never been at a work place that had strong opinions on tattoos or facial piercings (I don’t have either – my ears aren’t even pierced). I did have one work place dress code that actually read “business casual or fashion-forward. If you don’t know what fashion-forward means, you can’t wear it”. Current job seems to allow anything except offensive t-shirts.

          Liked by 1 person

          • You paint your nails in the bathroom? We do our nails at the kitchen counter. But you might not have a kitchen counter. I don’t get much of the little I’ve seen on TikTok. We have some traditional types in the office. But we do make exceptions for the younger generation. Since I wear all black all the time, I suppose I’m fashion-simple.

            Liked by 1 person

  2. Oh my gosh, this is hilarious! And your relationship with your husband sounds like a riot act!! 😀 Wow, that’s fabulous!! Sexualizing polygons has me still laughing out loud! 😀 Strut that stuff, you sexy polygon! 😀 HA HA HA HA HA HA! Oh my! Oh wow, you know what that reminds me of? There was a song when I was young that went, “It’s hip to be square,” which I think was cool-speak for, “It’s cool to be a dork,” but I’m not totally certain. So Sesame Street (or something kid-related) made a mock-song of it that went, “It’s hip to be a square,” with a dancing square and everything. Because yeah, shapes are sexy too, right? HA HAHA HA! Hilarious blog post!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. There’s no doubt about it that clothes can make all the difference in the world. I don’t think I’d be comfortable with my fiance doing that kind of work, though. I’d be worry he’d be mentally comparing me. One time I got jealous of him talking to a humanoid cat female in an RPG computer game. No one ever said I was normal. Anyways, all “joking” aside, I’m grateful he’s clueless about appearances and clothes. I was crying once about something and he said “Oh you’re getting your makeup on your face” and he tried wiping it off under my eyes but I wasn’t even wearing any makeup. At that moment I realized what I wear or how I style myself doesn’t matter. Honestly I’m very sus of men who notice when a woman needs to dye her roots or if something doesn’t match.


    • Oh gosh, I hate people who notice little appearance details like that, the details that do not concern them at all. There’s a lot of context I couldn’t give here, but I should have clarified that Husband mostly only cares about fashion within this virtual design context. He cares about how he looks like with respect to how different brands of jeans and suits look on him. But he is too self-absorbed to notice or care what I look like. Like when I came home having cut off several inches of hair and I said, “I don’t really like my haircut” and he was like “You got a haircut?” It would absolutely drive me crazy to be with someone who noticed my gray hairs, weight gain, dark circles, etc.

      We all have our irrational moments. I don’t get jealous of my husband talking to women, but I get jealous about him writing a better prompt poem in writing group, scoring better than me on a song in Karaoke Revolution or Sing Star video game, and just being generally better than me at everything.

      Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.